Dating & Relationships
Relationships are often sought after but rarely conquered successfully in the African American culture. Marriage has been a declining institution among all Americans and this decline is even more evident in the Black community. In 2016 only 29% of African Americans were married compared to 48% of all Americans. Half or 50% of African Americans have never been married compared to 33% of all Americans (Black Demographics, 2020).
It is the one entity of life that black women desire but have yet to master. As a black woman, I can tell you that is was relatively easy to master the process of going to college and earning a degree in order to create a better quality of life for myself and my children. It is easy meeting new people and being the socialite of the party. It is even easier to walk away from someone who doesn't fit our idea for a mate because of his exterior. In doing this, we often miss the mark of where we claim we want to be.
Relationships are needed to help balance our emotional well-being, create stability, build an alliance, learn to be a good friend and mate as well as to have someone to face life's challenges with. Kelly Benamati, 2017
Relationships can be one of the most difficult, tedious, and mentally draining contracts that we partake in this life. Whether it is a relationship between the parent(s) and children, boyfriend and girlfriend, between two friends, husband and wife, and even co-workers, it can be difficult.
SOMETIMES, we need to scale back and take a look at ourselves. Why are we so superficial? Why do we look at what he looks like and not at his heart? Okay, so sometimes we can't see the heart right away. However, I can truthfully tell you that IF he is into you, you won't have to search for his heart because it will already be with you. You have to work on you. You have to remove the blinders. You have to become who you desire in your life. Anything less is unfair to ask for.
Another thing you have to be aware of is being equally yoked with someone. For example, you may have one idea of what a relationship should look like and he may have a different view. However, you might not be ready for all that he is ready for. This is VITALLY important because you DO NOT want to be in different seasons of life with someone who you want to invest your emotions into. It might not ever work and will be extremely tumultuous and will inevitably end. Heed ALL warning signs that you feel your intuition telling you. That is your protection. In conjunction, establish clear boundaries, don't bend on them, don't break them, and DEFINITELY don't compromise you for someone else. It only leads to frustrations, devastation, and possibly depression or other mental/behavioral health issue.
Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 (ESV) 9 Two are better than one because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up! Again, if two lie together, they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone? And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him-a threefold cord is not quickly broken.
Everybody needs somebody. Relationships give us an opportunity to take a look at who we are, where we came from, and where we are going, even though you are still an individual. Relationship Coaching can work with you to define the elements needed to overcome the brokenness of past relationships that may have left you feeling worthless, less than, or that you are not good enough. Essentially, marriage is the ultimate goal for a lot of women. Others are fine just being in a relationship. Yet others are fine without either. This is not the group that I am talk about at this time. I am specifically speaking to the single women who desire marriage. I am speaking to the single women who desire a relationship. This is your time to shine. It's all about you. If you are ready to do your work to move into the life you want with your Boaz, schedule your
Chat with Coach Keci to obtain your empowerment strategy to get you on your way to relationship success.
Benefits of Affinity Coaching:
1. Keys to Rewarding Relationships
2. Master Healthy Relationships
3. Increase Emotional Intimacy
4. Avoid Unhealthy Relationship
5. Empowered to Use Assertively Stand in Your Power